01 December, 2012

Older and more knowledgeable on meerkats

I saw ‘Life of Pi’ today…. And as always, the good lord was kind enough to put me next to a bunch of fresh-into-college people. Needless to say, the entire bunch kept talking, checking their cellphones, laughing for no apparent reason and the worst of all… when one of the bunch decides he wants to say something to another of the bunch who has decided to sit at the other end on the row - fastest way to communicate…SCREAM! And I just sat there thinking to myself,” Stupid bloody youngsters! No respect for anyone else. Not a quart of responsible blood in their veins and all they can do is behave like delinquents and be a nuisance to the public….”

WHOA! WHOA! WHOOOOOOOOAAAAA! What the *insert profanity* just happened there? Did I just think THAT? Oh my god, I’ve turned into a disgruntled responsible adult. Oh lord. When did this happen? I’ve not even had most of the required rights-of-passage to move on from teenager to young adult to responsible adult. And here I am going “this generation has no respect for anyone’. Yikes, when did I get old? Is it all these children calling me ‘uncle’ that has made my sub-conscience come to assume that I am old? And my thoughts are further going into the realm of ‘Youth will never understand the value of experience and experience has forgotten the impatience of youth’ and so on and so forth. I almost felt like I was Dumbledore given some fatherly old-man advice to Harry Potter.

Needless to say, the rest of the movie was spent with me trying to perform Occlumency to close my mind off to such thoughts.

Let’s now talk about the other annoying part of the theater experience. A couple among the rowdy bunch of irresponsible teens, was sitting next to me. Yes, the fellow who was trying to communicate with his friend at the other end of the row by screaming. He was sitting next to this girl who was clearly the subject of his attempts at courtship. How do I know? Well why else would one ask about what one had for breakfast? How they got to the theater? Whom do they stay with at home? What kind of movies they like? And so on. Yes, I was eavesdropping…. My life is THAT empty and boring.

Our friend here has seen the movie before; I know this because he’s already telling her about the story and and in a rather loud voice what was going to appear on the screen. Normally, the old grumpy cynic in me gets peeved and requests people to go silent, but it was more fun listening to Fresh-boy here.

Spoiler ALERT. (Don’t read if you’ve not seen the movie). Fresh boy decides to name the animals before they pop up on the screen. He predicts a butterfly will come now. Only that it wasn’t a butterfly, but a hummingbird. He then says that they will show a mother and baby pig. The ‘mother-pig’ was actually a hippo. Girl is sitting there going uh-huh…uh-huh to fresh boy’s evident lack of knowledge of the animal kingdom. Thank god he did not call the iguana a komodo dragon. But he did say that he saw the same in ‘Skyfall’. He even called the ‘Meerkats’ as ‘that one that came in Madagascar, they will start singing and dancing now’, to which the girl was ROFL-ing (stupid younger generation don’t laugh, they just go LOL, ROFL, ROFLMAO all the bloody time). Those ,dear Fresh boy are lemurs….L-E-M-U-R-S…these are Meerkats… M-E-E-R-K-A-T-S. Notice the subtle spelling difference?

But to the boy’s credit, he’s here in a movie, with a girl and hitting on her with his extensive knowledge of animals to which she’s giggling away, while ‘someone else’ came home and wrote a blog about it!!! I guess that’s what we older and wiser people do….. Besides eavesdropping on courting couples in the theater. Clearly my knowledge of the ‘difference between a lemur and a meerkat’ is not exactly of much value in the real world. Of course unless I took a zoologist out.

PS: I think yours truly is just jealous that extensive knowledge on rock bands coupled with minimal knowledge of playing guitar and near zero experience of being in a rock band is not creating the necessary buzz in required target markets while inadequate understanding of the animal kingdom seems to give one a fighting chance.

 Here's a little something to get you all started on your extensive journey of learning about the Meerkat.